At times I seriously wonder if people are afraid of missionaries! This may sound a little weird, but after some of our experiences I really do think some people may at the very least be nervous around us.
Some people will not look at us even if they have to walk right by us. I've always thought it was a proper social grace to look at someone and say hello (especially in a church setting!). I try to make eye contact, but that's rather difficult to do when the person's focus is on the floor!
We have been in some churches in which I had no idea who the pastor's wife was or she barely gave me a hello. This has been very surprising to me because I assumed we were on the same "team" and would be able to relate to each other.
Some people avoid the table if we are near it. Because of this we rarely stand right by the table, but rather stand several feet from it. It seems people feel more comfortable looking at things or taking a prayer card when we are not hovering. We had a discussion about this with a missionary friend and their family has experienced the same thing. Maybe people are afraid it is like a military recruitment display and we're going to rope them into service!
At church lunches we are usually asked to go first. This gives the church people the opportunity to see how much the missionaries eat! :) Because we go first, we usually find a seat first. The surprising news? It seems some people view the seats on either side of us as the hot seats! At one lunch, the seats next to me remained empty the entire meal.
This has made me look at myself. Have I been friendly to missionaries? Did I make them feel welcome? Have I been helpful? (Watching 3 children while filling/balancing multiple plates, plastic ware, napkins, and cups and trying to eat fast for the next service can be challenging!) Did I take the time to talk to them and show interest in their ministry? I would have to say I found myself guilty of some of the things I wrote about above. I have determined that if we are ever in the pastorate again I will strive to go above and beyond in these areas.
How about you? What would your answers be to those questions?
1 comment:
Very compelling questions, Dellie. I love seeing this whole process through your experiences. I would TOTALLY come sit by you guys! Some folks are just so intimidated of meeting new people. They miss out on so much, huh? I'll be praying for you guys as you enjoy your little break & then head out for 8 weeks. Take care!
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